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Saturday, March 14, 2009

Hot Flashes Suck!

First off, apologies to the few men I know that read these ramblings of mine....but hey I gotta tell ya....Hot Flashes Suck!!

I've been having these stoopid things for awhile now...and I am Sick of it, Sick of it, I tell ya....

I'm tired of ripping off as many clothes as I decently can....and I'm tired of bundling up again about 10 seconds later.

Last night, I'm talking on the phone to the Gman who is away working for a bit....I want to go over a bill with him. It has to be paid soon and I have a couple of questions....

So, I'm in the Middle of my questions and then trying to listen to his answers. Uh oh....here it comes....instantaneous heat. I break out into a sweat. I Swear the back of my legs are even sweating....I'm not even listening anymore to what he's trying to explain to me.

Throw off the blanket I was cuddling under....off come the Uggs....off comes my sweater...off come my socks....off comes my sweatshirt. "OK, you were saying????"

Meanwhile I'm fanning myself like mad with the bill in question. He asks me to tell him what the amount is. I'm not willing to give up my fan...I ask him to wait..."what for?" "Hot flash, need the bill for a fan." Sigh....(I wonder if he's rolling his eyes?)

Ah, ok it's over with....I look at the bill. I blurt out the number. He starts talking again. Am I listening? No....

I'm too busy throwing all my clothes back on! all of a sudden, I'm Freezing cold....I ask him to wait...tell him I have to put the phone down....

I've learned I suck at multi tasking whilst having a hot flash....the Gman, with the patience of Job, waits on the other end of the line....

Ok, I say, explain it one more time, ok? (The poor guy!)

In our Valley, I'm not the only one Hot Flashing my way around the 'hood. There's a whole bunch of us. The husband of one of my friends, he's a nurse. Nursing Supervisor in his last job. Worked supervising mostly women, and yeah, you guessed it.

He says he spent the last 15 years on the job freezing to death....hahahaha. Then he retires, gets a couple years off, then his wife starts in on the Hot Flashes. He says he is sick and tired of being cold all the time. Meanwhile his wife is throwing off clothes and putting them back on.

My friend and I were yakking about the problem, while he was staring thoughftully into space....I said "Hey, what ya doing? What ya thinking of?" (I love teasing him!)

He looks at me, sighs and says..."I'm thinking of a way to wire all you ladies up...I figure there has to be a way to harness all of your heat power. We could probably produce electricity for the whole Valley off of you gals!"

Ha, we had a good laugh at that! Sphere: Related Content

5 comments:

Aunt Krissy said...

I had to have some female surgrey and after I had a few hot flashes.
I always thought that some of the ladies were telling tall tales about how hot they would get. I learned! My sheets would be very damp. I would make the nurses change the sheets after them as then I would be cold laying in the damp sticky sheets.

Nina Diane said...

right there with ya........I'm so over them

Linda said...

Ya I am so over them also! I remember my first hot flash very well! I was in JCPenny store in the 'have your photo taken' section and all of a sudden I had sweat literally rolling off me! *sigh* but thankfully that was the only truly bad one - from there it was just hot and cold, especially at night.

Hang in there - this too shall pass! LOL :)

Monique said...

You have to get this book by Susun Weed: The Menopausal Years, for women age 30 to 90. It's fantastic - will help you feel much more empowered about those hot flashes!!

Annie said...

My MILaw says that licorice is supposed to help...i Love licorice!

I love those Red Twizzlers, bad Annie, lol....